Simon Weir's December Column

"If I wanted cheap riding I'd get a pushbike"

I'm not going to do it. Moan about petrol prices, that is. Yes, I know they're spiralling out of control and I do wince every time I put £20 in the tank but, frankly, if I wanted cheap riding I'd get a pushbike.

Okay, I am too tight to enjoy getting my wallet out, but keeping riding affordably means spending wisely, not indulging in pointless penny-pinching. Instead of getting worked up about petrol prices, I've been thinking about fuel economy – or as we say in Norfolk, Fool Economy.

My obsessive-compulsive tendencies mean I keep a close eye on how my motorcycles drink – I even have spreadsheets. My Yamaha Fazer consistently returns 44mpg, unless I ride like an idiot, in which case it'll do 41mpg (or 36mpg on track). I know the Ducati Multistrada will give an unwavering 37mpg unless I ride like a Class One saint (40mpg), a vicar on valium (43mpg) or an erratic and not very skilful racer (31mpg).

Armed with this knowledge, I pointedly don't moderate my riding. You see, I want to enjoy my time on the bike and if that means putting an extra £2 of fuel in the bike, brilliant. If the cost of a trackday also includes spending a bit more on petrol, so be it – you don't go to a circuit to burn hydrocarbons slowly... More to the point, whether I'm at Cadwell Park or Bardney Bends, I'd rather consume my petrol in a manner appropriate to the conditions. Speaking as an advanced instructor, I must stress that never means lumping slowly along at rock-bottom revs in a high gear, the engine dangerously sluggish and unresponsive, just to improve my fuel economy by 3mpg - or 6mpg on the Multistrada.

Every time I turn the key, I want to make the best use of the available fuel - not the most frugal use. Bikes need to be nimble and light on their feet, so the rider can react to any hazard in the blink of an eye, which means keeping the engine running in its responsive midrange, not struggling along just past tickover.

Unfortunately, this seems to be something of a minority view. The DSA is keen to promote the eco-drive concept, encouraging low-revs riding and driving for greater fuel efficiency. Worse, many new cars are fitted with idiot lights to encourage dozy drivers to change up far too soon - which leaves them lurching cluelessly along the roads like metallic zombies.