Thundercat Diaries - It’s elementary

Well, my summer’s kind of done – the nights are drawing in, holiday’s over, and the poor old Thundercat has been sitting there kicking its own tyres while I lazed around on a French beach. Getting back on her has been like putting on an old, comfy pair of slippers – no-one else is going to get it, but just easing them on puts a big fat smile on my face.

            But as well as the warming embrace of ‘Cathood, there are salutary lessons to be learned on my return to the tarmac. Cruising up the M40, glad to be back on the bike even if three-lane motorway isn’t as much fun as twisty A road, my attention is drawn to the flash of brake lights ahead. No big deal, or you hope not, when they’re way off in the distance like that, but the odd flash grows to become lots of flashes and within seconds the horizon ahead of me is like a Hawaiian sunset.

            Things are still moving, but as we approach whatever-the-commotion-is, traffic is dodging frantically out of the inside lane, desperate to maintain 65mph – I’m in no hurry, so inside- and middle-lane is right where I’m at. Well, ok – ‘Cat and I do our observations, checking over our shoulder for a gap whilst keeping a weather eye on the traffic ahead of us, and eventually find a gap maybe an inch longer than the ‘Cat. With a cheery wave of thanks to the driver of the car behind – “don’t thank me, you two-wheeled b******, I wasn’t going to let you out,” I can almost hear him shout in enclosed rage – I move into the gap, and before you know it, the ‘Cat and I are cruising past the obstruction.

            It’s an interesting sight. There’s a caravan on the hard shoulder, maybe broken down, but the obstruction has been caused by another caravan slowing down to what seems like walking pace in the inside lane of this busy, rush hour motorway traffic. It looks like someone has slowed down to see if a fellow motorist and caravanner is in trouble and needs help. Now, whilst I appreciate the merit behind stopping to check on a fellow caravanner/car driver/biker/whatever in distress, there’s no doubt that there’s a time and a place for everything. Pulling onto the hard shoulder and stopping to check would have been fine, but driving at the same speed as Mark Cavendish on the inside lane of a motorway is not the way forward.

            This wasn’t and isn’t a gripe about car drivers or caravanners, you understand, Jeremy Clarkson I am not. But it proved a lesson, to me at least, that you can never be too observant, or know too much about what’s going on in the traffic around you. It’s not news and you’re aware of this already, I know, but today just served as a timely reminder that, even on the flattest, straightest bit of road, you can’t ever depend on the people in front of you not to do something stupid. .